Nine Sides (Twin Eclipse Version)

by Ethereal

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updated/remastered version of nine sides from fever dream

i started writing the lyrics around this time last year in the midst of probably the most devastating and horrifying time period of my life. at first it was really just a journal entry or prose or whatever and then overtime i warmed up to the possibility of it being made into a song. and then from there i became increasingly aware of how much these lyrics mean to me

it's weird how whenever i go back and read through my writing after some time has passed it feels like i resonate more than i did while writing them. not that it didn't resonate at the time too, it did but in a different way. like i have more clarity now on what i was feeling. more understanding

i read the lyrics to nine sides now and understand deeply what i felt during that point in my life. i look back at that time and wish i could write back to that version of me and give her the clarity that i have now

here's a new version of the song a year later. a reflection, a different perspective. with a few updates to the lyrics where i found answers to the questions i had when i first wrote this. a lot of the lyrics are the same and i don't have all the answers. but i had gained the ones i need at least to be able to start making some changes

lyrics

Tiny faded crisscross but not on my own say
And I’m pouring my guts into my own brain
Cuz that’s my realest friend these days
And it feels more than I could make space for in this saturated fate

I’m looking at the night sky and the moon’s staring back at me
His synchronizing phases with the tide
Had me believing that our soul shared a flame
But then I saw his face hiding in the clouds

Covering up your horizon you’d bury me in everyday
I wish there was a way to unroll these snake eyes with nine sides
I juggle in my pocket while you keep me locked in
Threaded eye sockets

I already see through every stitch you knitted in your kitchen
With lies on top for accent
It’s a pretty touch but it’s not enough to make a difference
All your facets keep knifing out like ragged tactics
Ornamented in a clever message

But I’m ahead of it now I expect it

A dream in a dream
Where you hid away your key
And the mirror’s telling you more
Than it’s telling me
There’s a decaying contract
In a church full of mouse traps
With windows eating every hue
The skyline needs

Superstition compass pointing out all the stages
You’re craving an encore from a grave
Testing how much it’ll take to rehearse a soul with a new clock
Lying to yourself that it’s the same

Pages ripped out and revised while you try to control time
And twist the fate then scribble out your name
You’re only living for a game of cards
The king of hearts
A hare that knew it from the start
With pride on his face watching the ouroboros snake

The endless race
Fourth at the gate
You always find a way
To vandalize the finish line
It blows my mind

The way it took this long
For me to realize the person
Underneath everything you fabricated
Was a stranger

A dream in a dream
Where you hid away your key
And the mirror’s telling you more
Than it’s telling me
There’s a decaying contract
In a church full of mouse traps
With windows eating every hue
The skyline needs

The way it took this long
For me to realize the person
Underneath everything you fabricated
Was a stranger

Originally written November 2022

Updated November 2023

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released November 11, 2023

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Ethereal Connecticut

girl decoding spaces

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